Congrats to all you NYC runners who just completed the marathon last weekend!
You trained your body to go the distance, and you did, all 26.2 miles of it. It is a huge accomplishment.
The NYC marathon is unique in that there are people cheering you on at every corner, you get to travel through so many different neighborhoods, and see so much of the city.
If you put in your 18 weeks of training and your long runs, you might have even enjoyed the marathon.
But a marathon can be awful, understandably, without the right training.
Today I’m writing a bit on marathons and relationships.
Relationships are a lot like marathons.
They aren’t easy, they require work, and there are many hills and obstacles along the way.
In relationships, you go the distance with someone.
But many people don’t put in the training, and as a result, they can be awful.
Let’s face it:
We don’t learn about the important things in school (how to have a healthy relationship, and how to do our taxes).
And many people don’t have the training from important people in their lives. Remember, the divorce rate still hovers around 50%!
So do your training.
Learn about how to have a healthy relationship, and don’t assume that you naturally know how to as a result of being human.
Don’t get discouraged if things are going wrong in your relationship either.
Serious relationship distress is more common than you realize.
You’d think someone was crazy if they just decided to run a marathon without putting in some serious training.
But unfortunately, that’s how many people go into relationships, not realizing what it takes to have a successful one.
Then people feel ashamed and horrible for not getting it right.
Would you really beat yourself up if you decided to just go run a marathon without preparation and failed miserably?
So don’t beat yourself up if you’re not getting it just right in your relationship.
Instead, do your training. Do it together.
There is a map out there that helps partners figure out how to have their best relationships. It’s called Emotionally Focused Therapy.
Even if you don’t want to see a therapist, learn about it so you can understand what makes relationships tick.
Cheers to your best relationship, and congrats again to all you runners!