These are the words of my 5th grade teacher when we’d scribble our handwriting onto blank pages.
In other words, don’t try to squeeze all of your words into the minimum space possible.
Your words deserve breathing room.
Why I remember this particular detail, I don’t know, but the phrase had a ring to it that felt good.
It offered permission to really spread out, use up the paper.
Now that I think about it, I suppose he should have used the words “take up space.”
You can probably see where I’m going with this?
The sage advice goes beyond penmanship tips for 10 year olds.
Taking up space in your relationship is absolutely necessary.
If you don’t, you might feel like you have to ask for space in the future…(and no one likes that conversation).
Biting your tongue, deferring to your partner’s wishes, holding back because you don’t want to rock the boat…these are all examples of not taking the space that you need.
If not taking up space in your relationship is all you’ve known, you may not even notice that you’re not taking space.
Some part of you may be growing resentful.
I’m asking you to do a little internal reflection here and ask yourself:
Are you taking up the space you deserve (and you deserve infinite space)?
Dig deep and ask yourself what you truly desire – do you give yourself the chance to do that?
Giving yourself that space and then making it clear with others in your life is an example of something that may be easier NOT to do if it’s more convenient to “let it slide.” This is also the kind of thing that can add up over time and destroy relationships if you continue to marginalize yourself by not getting honest and speaking up about what you need and want — first with yourself, then others.
Take up space in all relationships.
The advice goes well beyond not only penmanship tips but romantic relationships too.
Take space in the world.
You need to hear this especially if you’re more of a “giver.”
Maybe people energize you and you love giving, uplifting, brightening people’s days…it fills you up.
Don’t forget to take up space for you too.
Taking up space is actually an act of giving in many ways – giving of yourself.
Truly, it’s an act of generosity.
The world needs you to fill the space that only you can.
So does your significant other.
That’s why they’re with you – to be with YOU, a real person with needs and desires.
Ones that evolve and grow with time.
Don’t be selfish and share them elsewhere and not with your partner, even if they might rock the boat in your relationship.
Take up space.
Even if it’s uncomfortable — especially if it’s uncomfortable!
It might feel easier to hide…
It might feel safer even, because you can’t be let down if you don’t let your desires out.
You’ll guarantee a life of being unfulfilled if you aren’t courageous enough to look for them.
So do it – take up space.
Write all over the page, because as I learned from my 5th grade teacher back in the day, your words — and your essence — are more valuable than any paper.
For today…ask yourself:
How can I take up more space in my relationship?
How can I share more of myself, more of my desires, with those in my life who matter to me?
How can I make more room for what I really want in my reality — and share it?
Let me know in the comments if you come up with anything new.
Here’s to taking up more space,